The hoodie is the most versatile piece of clothing ever invented. Any occasion can be improved by one.
Remember all the way back to elementary school and its cold, bleak first period classes. What was better to wear than your trusted comfy sweatshirt, like an extension of your bedspread itself? It had a big pocket in which you could store snack cakes and makeshift dart guns, and the hood itself was perfect for when you wanted to look all cool and mysterious.
College students are particularly fond of the hoodie. This is because you can put one on over your pajamas and still look marginally dressed. Not very well dressed, mind you, but marginally dressed is good enough for a lot of people studying for majors in such subjects as Postmodern Finger Puppetry and Septum Piercing Industry Management and Technology.
Maybe now you occupy some niche in society where you can’t wear a hoodie every day. If you are a defense attorney, for example, and you show up to the the trial of the century wearing your “Cabo San Lucas Spring Break ‘02” hoodie, the judge will give your client the chair on principle. Doctors have to go without hoodies as well. You just can’t tell a man that he has gout when you’re wearing a hoodie.
When you’re finally able to let down your hair and put on a hoodie, you want to make the moment count for something. Don’t settle for one of our competitors’ inferior hooded sweatshirts, made from woven banana leaves and smeared with animal droppings. Choose to wear only Libertas Bella men’s hoodies, made from a balanced blend of cotton and polyester and featuring all of our most popular designs.
We are most fond of the Nine Hoodie ourselves, a tribute to a great 9mm Luger pistol cartridge. If it sells especially well we may soon introduce the 9mm Glisenti, 9mm Steyr, and 9mm Flobert hoodies.