True Conservative Pundit Fanny Pack

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The practice of conservatism used to entail espousing nonexperimental fiscal policies and wishing to preserve social constructs that had proven themselves valuable during recent centuries. Today, a conservative is anyone who thinks the Secretary of Defense shouldn’t wear a gimp mask to United Nations summits.

This is the inevitable outcome of Democrats continually pushing things further and further to the left. They have shifted the Overton window to such a degree that a contemporary “moderate” is only slightly more left-leaning than a communist from 20 years ago.

The rational part of us hates this new imposed reality – but another, more devious part of us can’t wait to see where things wind up. What would the future’s equivalent of William F. Buckley, Jr. even have to argue? “Of course Jesus was a BIPOC crossdresser who would have wanted microchips implanted in everyone’s brains by the year 2050. But I believe we’re going too far by dedicating taxpayer money to fund sexual reassignment surgery for housepets.”

It’s not that bad – yet – but we promise you, we’re barreling toward it faster than you’ll let yourself fear. That’s why we want you – yes, you – to become a conservative pundit. You don’t have to appear on CNN as a modern-day equivalent of St. Sebastian. You just have to respond to leftist lunacy with a modicum of reason. Don’t let them assume they’ve defined the confines of “acceptable discourse.” Put your foot down, and let them know what someone thinks when they have the audacity to actually do it.